A day in the life...

This one is for all the stay-at-home moms I know...And I don't know how you do it.

A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn around the garden. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house. There was no sign of the dog.

Walking in the door, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over and the throw rug was against one wall. In the front room the TV was on loudly with the cartoon channel and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was all over the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife curled up in bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled and asked how his day went.

He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?'

She smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you come home from work you ask me what in the world do I do all day?

''Yes," was his incredulous reply.

She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.'

Mr. Personality

Jackson has parent-teacher conferences at daycare. Chad thinks these are ridiculous ("Congratulations, your child is walking..." he says when I ask if he wants to attend another one), but I find them mildly helpful. Why? Because I can ask his teachers things I wouldn't bring up to a doctor that are burning a hole in my mind.

At our semi-annual conference this go-around, I heard all about how Jackson can turn pages of a book (yep), help take off his own shirt and pants (check), and understand a few words (uh-huh). He's doing absolutely everything a 16-month-old should be doing.

But here's what I was really wondering from a woman who spends her entire day with kids his age. Did Jackson have more of a temper than other children? Was he more demanding and feisty?

When I asked the question, there was a pause. Pausing during parent-teacher conferences means that the teacher is thinking about how to respond. And that's never a good sign. The teachers there are always direct and no-nonsense. Oh dear Lord...what was I going to hear?

After a moment, Miss Patti, who I just absolutely love and who treats Jackson like he is her own son, starts to speak very slowly, as if she's choosing her words carefully. Then she says the kindest thing I've ever heard:

"I think...well...I think maybe Jackson is just very smart. He was telling us when he was really young what he wants."

And then this sweet, mild-mannered Hispanic woman closes her eyes, points across the room, and replicates his I-want-this-right-now chant:

MAMAMAMAMAMA!

Yep, that's my boy.

This is a child with a very strong opinion, and I have no doubt that someday this assertiveness will be one of my favorite characteristics. It's bound to get him into trouble but I like to think that if we raise him the right way, this personality will help him make really good choices, too. Until that day, oy vey, it's exhausting. But in the moments lately where he has tested my patience, I think of Miss Patti's perspective, and it makes me smile.

He's not cantankerous, he's smart.

Bless you, dear woman, for giving me another viewpoint. Even if you only said it because you thought it would get me through the crazy days, thank you. You are worth every penny.

My second child

Surprise! Earlier this year, I had another baby.

I'm only half-kidding.

Since January, we've been knee-deep in this video contest called "This is Retail," which is supposed to tell the stories of the people who work in our industry. Much like a child, this thing has taken YEARS off my life. I created it, I baked it for a little while, and then it came to life. And there is no putting that genie back in the bottle now, even though sometimes I wonder what in the hell I was thinking.

It's true that someone from Monmouth is in the running, which is a little town near where I grew up, but that's not who I'm rooting for to take home our $25,000 grand prize. (Galesburg people, please don't kill me.) I'm voting for this small businessman who does an incredible job showing how retail powers the economy.

I love this guy. I'd shop in his store if I was closer to it. And, umm, if I was a runner.



So my ask: Get your little self on www.retailmeansjobs.com/vote and vote for my buddy Jim through this Sunday (ten times per day per email address). I love this guy and his story. Of the 2,000 YouTube hits, I swear I've watched this video like 100 times.

I'd like to say it all ends here.

But as with having a child ... the first three months you don't even remember, the second three months are kind of a fog, and then it just continues to get better. Until after a year or so, you forget about all the sleepless nights and the nausea and the complete immersion into something bigger than you are and you're stupid enough to decide you might be willing to go through it all again. So stay tuned for more info on next year's contest once I get through this insanity.

Totally tubular

Apparently nine ear infections in as many months is a sign that it's time for tubes. So a few weeks ago, we went to an ENT who confirmed that was our best course of action. In between scheduling the surgery and our "go" date, Jackson got another ear infection, which I took as a sign that we were making the right decision.

The surgery was this morning at 8 a.m. and we were back in recovery with him at 8:20. It took Jackson awhile to get back into sorts after the anesthesia but after a long morning nap he was back to his old self.

Since it was a beautiful day, we got to play outside a little this afternoon - and Jackson got to play with his Easter gift from his Grandma and Grandpa Davis. The little mower blows bubbles but I hadn't refilled it, though Jackson sure didn't care. When they say kids bounce back fast after surgery, they're not kidding!